What that meant for me is that if I had a bad week or two, I would give up and declare myself a loser, a failure, not fit for even trying. And I did this to myself over and over and over again, never really learning that this wasn't the way to achieve anything. But I finally realize now that by focusing on the place I'm at, week by week, I'm making strides towards the bigger goal.
I started the Couch to 5K program last week and am really enjoying it. I'm actually enjoying the process of taking the time for myself to go to the gym, get on the treadmill and check out for a half hour while I accomplish a goal. A goal of FINISHING one piece at a time.
Last week I was dealing with a lot of anxiety - work, wedding planning, school, hormones. It was all a little too much for me and I was cracking a bit. But in spite of that, I still completed Week 1 of the C25K program, I still tracked every bite of food I consumed, I still lost weight. I realized that the anxiety was only going to get worse if I didn't treat myself well. So when I was feeling rotten, I'd go to the gym and bust out a few miles on the treadmill. Or I'd eat a handful of raspberries instead of a bag of chips. I gave myself the gift of health and it made me feel better!
I know that I have to just be patient with myself and give me the room and time to achieve my goals. Some weeks will be tough, but some weeks will be great. And it's taken me 32 years to get here, I can't turn it around overnight. But I'll keep trying because I deserve it!
|Stretching after a C25K workout on the treadmill.|